Reverie (Part 1)

The stars were twinkling softly as she lay quietly on the grass. The breeze carried the sweet intoxicating smell of the night. The silvery glow of the dancing grass made the hill look enchanted. The soft rustling of the leaves of the nearby trees were in exact tune with the melodious whine of the gentle wind. The valley beneath lay tranquil; the lake rippling to the wind quietly. Faraway the mountain range lay lost in the foggy darkness. The moon quietly reigned over the mesmerizing landscape.

It was her favourite place. The only place where she could escape to; she loved to escape to. Every night she would come here and look up at the stars. And she would stop worrying. Stop thinking. She would smile.

And she would remember him. And how if he had been here everything would've been different. How she would have been happy again.

Night of no regrets

Tide rises as the sun does set,
On these sands of age-old bonds,
Tonight there'll be no regrets,
As we travel apart far beyond.

Holding hands for one last time,
We look far off at the dying day,
Like memories past, it feels sublime,
A little more time, we both now crave.

Oblivious to the hurting hues,
We remind ourselves of the love and laughs,
Which will in spite of every bruise,
Find their way to our epitaphs.

Calling has come, we have to leave,
With leadened cores, and smile of lies,
A pair of hearts surrender to grieve,
But tacit sorrow the face defies.

A Thousand Stars

Thousand stars, not one so bright,
To light my way through the darkest night,
But only your love, home did me guide.

To everyone and all I might seem strong,
However only I do know it to be wrong,
In truth 'twas your faith in me all along.

A thousand stars,
Yet not one so bright,
My path to light,
Through the darkest night.

But with you by me,
By my side,
You give me might,
To fight my fight.

You hug me close,
And hold me tight,
And all my fright,
Into ashes ignite.

You assure me that,
It'll be alright,
All in spite,
Of the dismaying sight.

I close my eyes,
And open to see,
You fade to white,
Evanescing away.

I try to catch,
And not let go,
But all despite,
You fade away.

I feel your love,
And you in me,
I'm born again,
For the final fight.

A thousand stars,
Built by your faith,
Give me strength,
Through my darkest night.

An Ode to a Lost Friend

A long-lost friend, in a long-lost time,
A friendship so immortal,
Memories are still fresh but,
It feels so unreal, so sublime.

We laughed away without a care,
Of your futures unaware,
We talked our hearts out,
And nothing did we fear.

You gave me strength and stood by me,
When no one else was there,
But I wasn't there to save,
You from your misery.
And I'm sorry.

Guilt is my alias, shadow my soul,
I should've been there,
But now its too late,
Our friendship's now a ghoul.

A chance of redemption, forgiveness
I would certainly die for,
But I know God's not merciful,
To bless me with such completeness.

So many words left unsaid, so many,
Memories were to be made,
A friendship unseen,
But now I'm left alone on my knees.

I still remember your face so happy,
You trials to cheer me up,
Why wasn't I there?
To save you, to help you remain so.

I can only blame myself, that's all I can do,
But I promise one last thing,
My friend, forever shall I,
Worship our friendship with a heart true.

I'm sorry.

Snow

I took one step forward
And you took one step back
I'm not sure that you're ready
To pick up where we left off

I'm sorry I know and so do you
My life has been not so easy
To find myself I had to let you go
But believe me I did so with a promise

To come back for you
And even if you don't believe
It has been always so
I had to become me
To be with you

As I stand in the ruins alone
Of what had been once special
I realize what I let go to earn back
But I guess its too late to apologize

You're right to forget and not forgive
It was over the day I left
It was over when I tried to build for it
It was over when I promised to come back

Come back to you
And even if you don't believe
It has been always so
I had to become me
To be with you

And now I come back to an empty house
You've left with the fall
And its been snowing since
I'm cold but have no one to hold

Maybe this wasn't worth everything
To win, one has to lose
But never did it cross me
To win you I have to lose you

The snow is now too deep for me to walk
I have to give up, my feet buried deep
I wish I could see you one last time
Memories snow down heavy and soft
Like darkness they settle over me
Cold smiles warmly and I smile back
I wish I could see you one last time
Before I leave

Image Courtesy - http://goo.gl/uOCRp

Rust

Inside me an empty hollow resounds throughout,
I stare around with empty eyes unable to cry out,
The pain that has been haunting me since ages,
Eats me away slowly as the rusted war still rages.
I see you in front of me, and everybody else,
As my heart burns silently and my wound revels,
In injury but I still smile and let you know I'm fine,
Because I know that the suffering should all be mine.

I have myself only to blame,
For my invisible tears,
And I don't feel ashamed to claim,
To have surrendered to my own fears.
The fear of losing you,
Keeps me within me,
And if only I had a clue,
True to you I would be.

The chasm that separates us is too vast,
To be bridged with ease and so fast,
But I promise you that even though I can't let you in,
I would tirelessly never stop fighting from within.
I can't let my ghosts haunt you,
And make you fight against things you would never do.
My heart is pure I can assure,
But I'm not sure I can find a cure.

But now I take a stand and begin to fight,
I can't lose you, I have lost enough,
But my shadow is too strong for my might,
And I fall down to an endless night above.

I lose my senses, I lose me now,
But I've to stay awake; awake somehow,
You look worried and hold my hand,
And I know I won't lose, no I can't.
I pick myself up, firm my resolve,
With your touch my courage evolves,
Then you look, and smile at me,
And I know what I have to be.

A warrior who has to bury his past,
And have to start a life anew,
With you, my love, I can be at last,
The man in me that you always knew.

My First Novel: Chapter 10

Previous: Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9

10

It began to rain as soon as I entered my room, after finishing my dinner. My heart was still beating vigorously. It became faster as the raindrops beat harder on the roof. I sat on the bed for a moment looking out of the window. I realized the fact that the windows were open and the rain was coming in after a long time. I got up quickly and shut the gaping window close. Then I went for the other two windows – one on the opposite wall looking at the backyard below, and the other overlooking the balcony. Then I lunged for the balcony door from where a steady brook of rainwater was flowing into the room, as it lacked a threshold.

I caught hold of the door, but I suddenly stopped doing what I was doing. My eyes were fixed outside at the rain. I stood there for a moment. Then I left the door as it was and stepped outside into the balcony.

The balcony had a metal railing but no shade. The rain was pouring into the balcony and it was slowly being converted into a pool – the small outlet along the side of the balcony was inefficient.

My feet made a splashing sound on the collected water as I slowly walked towards the railing. I held onto the wet railing, looked up at the pouring sky and closed my eyes.

The raindrops began washing my face … my body …… my soul.

Then I lowered my face and looked around. The rain was touching everything in sight. The rainwater drained from the top of the cottages, sliding down as small rivulets along the sides of the roofs and splashed against the road beneath in a brief ‘waterfall’. The streetlights seemed dimmer than usual as the glass panes covering the electric bulbs were coated with a thin covering of water. The asphalt road was clean of everything – men and cars – but was smeared by a thin sheet of rainwater. The scenery was beautiful!

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THE RAIN?” someone shouted at me from behind. I turned around to see my mother, as I had expected, standing in front of the door. And before I could utter a word, I was sitting wrapped up in a blanket with a cup of steaming coffee in my hand in front of the fireplace, my hair just blown dry by the hair dryer.

Well, I didn’t have to wait long to get company. Soon father was also sitting in front of the fireplace in the same outfit as me, who had been welcomed home with a shriek as soon as my mother answered the doorbell. At first, I felt embarrassed but I realized that father was much more embarrassed than I was; that made me feel better.

Sipping from our coffee cups, we discussed how our days had gone. Father told me that today he just got a small glimpse of how much work is to done. He also said that it was not possible to say how long it might take to get the new branch up and about. I told him that I went about the village and saw the place a little and I liked it. I didn’t mention about Lisa. I didn’t know why.

Later, mother called us and after giving us a good five-minute lecture asked us to finish the dinner fast and go to bed quickly. So we finished our dinner quite fast, as we didn’t need another dose of mother’s lecture.